When enough is enough
What Socrates meant when he said the unexamined life is not worth living
Happy Friday,
When you’re having a great day, we don’t tend to sit down and figure out why. But, ever noticed that if you’re having a lousy day, there’s a laundry list of reasons?
If that’s you, congratulations. It means you’re more self aware than most folk.
Most people aren’t even aware when they’re foul.
Everyone else is, though.
We all get out of sorts. We all have enough is enough days.
Today was my turn.
One of my clients is dealing with a legal issue that’s not their fault or mine, but we have to deal with it all the same. Same issue I mentioned couple of weeks ago. It's still going on, of course. Lawyers like billable hours.
Plus, I'm working on a cart rebuild that needs to launch in a couple of weeks. I haven’t written on Medium all week because too busy and blah, blah, whine, whine. lol.
On a whim, I asked Google about being out of sorts and found a Medium article, because of course I did. There’s no shortage of people telling you how to fix your life on Medium.
It went something like this. Out of sorts? Let’s fix that! You can listen to cheerful music and sing along, or you focus on some of your bestest, most positive memories. You can meditate or use some other mindfulness technique to get out of your head and into the now, or write things you’re grateful for in a gratitude journal because gratitude is good. Or heck, call a friend to cheer you up!
Bite me, dude. I wanted to slap the guy. lol.
Look, we don’t have to be happy all the time
It’s not normal. Or healthy, for that matter. Discontent has a purpose. Discontent is how you know something is wrong. Just like physical pain tells us something is wrong, mental pain also tells us something isn’t right.
But it helps if you examine it. You know that saying about the unexamined life not being worth living? That’s what it means.
Take my lousy day, for example.
If I examine it, here’s what I come up with. I like the work I do. I like the people I work with. There was a day I couldn’t say either of those. The commute is awesome. Kitchen to office. In bare feet. With coffee.
So why am I out of sorts? Same reason we all get out of sorts.
Apparently, there are 3 reasons we get out of sorts
In addition to the self help whack-a-mole on Medium, I also found an article by a psychologist. He said most of the time we humans get out of sorts, it can be attributed to three things.
1) Perceived lack of control
2) Negative emotions, like worry or fear
3) Stress and/or overwhelm
I don’t need to explain those, right? Here’s the important part.
Unlike the self help guru, he doesn’t suggest a feel good band-aid solution. He suggests that when we’re out of sorts, it might help to examine what we’re feeling. Maybe even look to see if there’s a difference between what our head is saying and what our gut is saying. Nice thing about bad moods is they pass.
Sometimes, the body says no...
I knew a guy that ran 3 businesses about a decade ago. They provided a good living. House in the suburbs, college for the kids. One business was growing faster than the others, but he was working insane hours juggling them all.
His gut kept saying if he shut the flailing ones, he could focus on the one that’s growing. But he was afraid to lose the income. So he worked 15 hour days.
Then he had a heart attack. When he recovered he had one rule. Not to work himself to death. So he shut one and hired someone to help with the other.
There’s always a solution. But we have to examine what’s really happening before we can find it. The mood says no first. If we don’t listen, the body speaks next.
And me? I’ll write next week. Medium isn’t going anywhere.
:)
“The unexamined life is not worth living” — Socrates
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Thanks and have a great weekend.
xo,
Linda
As usual, this is right on time. I wrote today a journal entry called "This week. Just...damn." that contained this thought: I'm in a bad way this week. First the sad saga of XXXX, then finding out about YYYY's death, and just...everything. I'm sad, I'm overwhelmed, I feel like everything is just too much and that I don't have anything left to help me pull this out." Generally, I'm introspective, but also optimistic AND cynical. What I'm not, generally, is sad. Thanks, as usual, for finding me where I am.
Pope Francis Historic visit to IRAQ, first & only Pope to visit IRAQ, write few words about it to be part of the HISTORY as a writer, you have a new FRIEND from Baghdad, IRAQ your eyes here in IRAQ. Will keep you updated, Sam John.