My 5 Little Rules For Growing Substack To The Moon Without Being Pitchy

Most of the "advice" didn't work for me so I invented my own little rules and they're kind of right-brain but maybe you'll find this helpful

Mama used to call me a late bloomer and she said that because I didn’t need a bra until eighth grade and I didn’t have my first boyfriend until I was sixteen turning seventeen but now that I’m over fifty I know it was more than those things.

Seems I learn everything the slowest possible way and I finally figured out why that is and it’s because I feel like I have to do things the way ‘everyone’ does because who am I to be different but what everyone else does never works for me. It doesn’t.

So I try and I try and finally when I say I can’t anymore, I can’t do it that way and decide to do something the way that feels right to me, then it finally works.

I don’t know if that’s a me thing or a right-brain thing, but I think maybe it’s some of both. For example? I can’t be market-y to save my life. And I know. I should have text pasted smack in the middle of my writing every week to say SIGN UP NOW and **this publication is supported by readers** and blabbety blah but I just can’t do that.

Every time I tried it, I deleted it before I published because it just felt ick. I can’t feel like a tabloid. I can’t. I want to feel like a friend and storyteller and maybe even a creative weirdo and just what I am — a person who’s madly in love with words.

I’ve been on Substack a long time. Almost five years.

And most of them? I was a mouse in the wall and barely anyone knew I was here. I’d see other Substacks boasting that they grew to thousands of followers in six months but when I went to look more often than not it was a little shouty to fit me.

But another advice said just keep at it, keep at it, it’s a long game and boy was it ever. Year after year I crawled along and it took me almost five years to get 2000 followers and when I hit that number I laughed and cried and went out to have ice cream.

Once I decided I can’t do what everyone else does and I can’t be markety or pitchy I decided maybe I should figure out what I can do. Not just what I can’t.

Also known as make a plan, goofball.

So I made five rules for myself and followed them religiously and I don’t normally share screencaps because they push a little into ick for me, but I want you to see.

Because I don’t know, but maybe what worked for me will work for you.

So here are the five little rules I made for myself.

Rule #1. Heart everything I read.

One thing that makes me sad about the internet is how few people respond. And I know that’s normal. I do. But it kills me a little when I see 5000 people read a story I wrote and only 100 thought it deserved a heart. Which is free. You know?

And people get defensive about that, think they should only heart what ‘deserves’ to be hearted and they have criteria to decide that. But I decided I wasn’t going to be that person. If you got me to read, you get a heart. Because it’s hard showing up day after day and putting your heart out in the world to the sound of crickets.

Rule #2. Never, never, ever leave a generic comment

You will never hear me say “thank you for sharing” and the reason is that you can say that to anyone, post it on any story. So I decided that if I made it to the bottom of a piece I would say what comes to mind based on what I just read.

Sometimes it’s “Christ, Roman” or “Shawn, you made me cry again” and you can reverse those names and it would still fit. But here’s the thing. If I told my friend or my sister or my kid a story that was meaningful to me and they said “thanks for sharing” or “good one” and then walked away I’d feel so crushed. You know?

But they wouldn’t. Because it’s aloof and I don’t want to be aloof when someone has taken the time to write something meaningful. Doesn’t have to be long. Just sincere.

Rule #3. Reply to every comment until I can’t anymore

In the beginning I could answer every comment. Once they get past 100 it gets harder. But I think in a world where millions of posts go up every day if a person takes the time to leave a comment, it’s just a nice thing to reply. Especially to the people who say something real and human. You know?

Rule #4. Click on Activity more often than Notes. lol

I try to do that every morning but sometimes I miss a day. In the past I didn’t even look at my activity feed and I had no idea how much is in there. It’s amazing. I can see comment on old posts that I missed, see people restacking and the comments they leave. I heart and respond and thank people like crazy in the activity feed.

Rule #5. Post uplifting things in Notes when you can

I don’t use notes very often. It gets to feel Twitter-ish sometimes with all the political stuff and ranting and people complaining about what they don’t want to see and it wears me out. And I know rage-bait works and gets clicks but it also burns people out and I think it’s a race to the bottom that no one wins.

But also? If you click the three dots by any note you can see how many subscribers you got from that note and I found that it’s always the ones where I share something people didn’t know or share something happy that gets me most subscribers.

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I once read a piece that said all humans walk around with a sign on their forehead saying please see me. I think it was Erma Bombeck, but I could be wrong. But that’s my whole strategy in a nutshell. To see people. Because how dare I expect people to see me if I don’t see them right back. Not follow for follow because that’s lame.

It goes without saying that the writing has to be interesting. It doesn’t have to be literature and it doesn’t have to be perfect. But if I’m writing my journal online, it stands to reason maybe it won’t interest very many other people. But I think we can write about all those same things in a way that acknowledges that there’s a reader.

And if you have a tip that’s not shouty and it’s working, please do share in in the comments. I’d love to know what’s working for you!

“Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow
Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead
Walk beside me… just be my friend”
― Albert Camus